New cowmobile - Crisisler 300

[theholycow]

has been off the road for a few years, probably about as long as we've been away from AOT. It needed some re-engineering and I've been super lazy about it. I'd work on it for a few hours then not touch it for days, months, or a year at a time. I think the re-hacking is done so all that remains is to put the transmission back in, replace brake lines that rusted while it has been sitting, and probably replace lots of hoses and belts that likely rotted too...might only need a couple Saturdays of work but it's been at that point for probably a year.

In the meantime, in Spring 2020 I was given a 2005 Chrysler 300 - 3.5L V6, RWD, etc. I've always been anti-Crisisler but I gotta admit it's a super nice way to get around. It even has a moonroof! I've always wanted one, but never had one. Also has air conditioning that actually works! Very comfy, plenty of room, tons of little luxuries, and surprisingly quick for an old-tech V6 in a 4,000lb full size car with a 4 speed slushbox.

With 260,000 miles on the clock it definitely exhibits the Crisisler shitty reliability that I've always expected, but it doesn't work out as badly as expected. It's mostly far easier to fix than my rotted GMs have been with all their seized bolts...fasteners simply come right out the way they should, and most of the things I've fixed have been very easy to access. Apart from one pulley that would have been easy if I had borrowed/bought the right tool, replacing the timing belt was a cakewalk, for example. It can even report its own OBD2 codes after doing a little dance with the ignition key!

Photos?

Imagine a typical beat-up aging off-white 300 with rusty rocker panels and dented fenders. It's not anything to show off!

[Dubyagee]

Good cars. Chrysler quality. Stay ahead of oil leaks and youre good.

[BillyJeanKing]

pictars or it didn't happen

[nekkidhillbilly]

Wanna sell gb ever let me know lol

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I has two buicks

[theholycow]

Sell ?



...but seriously, I may end up not keeping it forever so I better remember that you want it!

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Originally Posted by Dubyagee

Good cars. Chrysler quality. Stay ahead of oil leaks and youre good.

Story time, boys and girls!

The old pre-Pentastar 3.5 suffers from a nasty design flaw. The thermostat is located at the inlet and requires a small bypass circuit to allow coolant to flow enough that hot coolant will reach the thermostat. Crisisler implemented it with a tiny passage cast or drilled into the block, I guess somewhere near the bottom (BTW, "somewhere near the bottom" also describes the blind, tight location where the thermostat housing is).

That's all well and good as long as the engine is run daily, maintenance is performed on schedule, and the engine doesn't have a zillion miles on it. Once that tiny passage clogs, the thermostat won't open and the engine will overheat uncontrollably.

Last Fall while fixing a leaky coolant hose I removed the thermostat and placed one inline inside the upper radiator hose, per a thread found on a car forum. I forgot to drill a small hole in the thermostat since it will still need some bypass flow.

All winter it was mostly ok; occasionally it would start to overheat, but all I had to do was rev the engine way the hell up and that would thrash the coolant enough to get some hot stuff to the thermostat and open it, then the temperature would drop like a rock. One annoying thing about that workaround was that the engine is rev-limited in neutral to 4,000 RPM which usually wasn't enough, so I'd have to leave it in gear and floor it up to a speed that would do the job.

Anyway, winter passed, spring sprung, and I still didn't drill that bypass hole. With the warmer weather it was overheating more often. One unseasonably hot day it refused to cool down. I turned around and headed for home while I kept hammering on it trying to trigger that thermostat, to no avail.

After a while I got it cool enough to stop for a minute and check under the hood. I pulled the engine oil dipstick and it was totally dry! I had been flogging the everliving fuck out of that engine for a few miles with no oil and lots of overheating. I figured that was the end, but standing there roadside I refilled the oil (I had plenty in the trunk that I had just bought) and it immediately behaved - quiet, smooth, and cool.

I should have gone home and changed the oil immediately. That new oil was probably full of leftover sludge. Instead, I was worse than my usual lazy procrastinatory self; I went months and 11,000 miles before I changed it again (just a few weeks ago).


I haven't seen any evidence of engine oil leaks so it probably just burned/sludgified the oil during all that overheating. (It does leak power steering fluid, at the steering gear/rack...why couldn't it be a hose? )

I did at least remove that thermostat immediately...when the cool weather returns I'll put a thermostat in again, this time with a bypass hole drilled.

Some time between then and the recent oil change it started occasionally going "DING!" with a split-second flash of the oil pressure light on the dash, when it's been driven for a while (fully warmed up) and I come to a stop, especially on a hill. :derpcow:

So, I'm amazed that it still runs great every damn day. Plenty of power. Can't tell if it's smooth and quiet or not, however, due to an exhaust leak that's kind loud and, uhh....unsmooth? Vibraty? I half-ass welded it (at the rear joint of the drivers side cat) to take it from insanely offensively loud down to merely irritatingly loud. God forbid I buy $10 worth of exhaust pipe and clamps, much better to waste a pound of fluxcore welding wire and spend a whole weekend getting welding spatter injuries on hot shirtless days and not even fix it decently, amiright?!

[nekkidhillbilly]

yeah id come get it and trailer it home. got a 350 for it lol.

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https://www.instagram.com/p/CNiuGbMM...6rtOsP6nkLlU0/
i got this about a year ago

[stonehenge]

Rollin a 2000 Tracker (4wd, 4dr). Been taking care of the poor bastard. Kinda want RCSB OBS k1500 but everything is expensive right now.

We got a 300 (2016ish) when we drove to Wyoming. That bitch was comfy. Had cooled seats! Did like.

[nekkidhillbilly]

shit i got like 6 cars right now

i have my 66 gs still, the 72 lesbare, the 90 bronco, my 05 ram, wife equinox (i hate that car), and 89 subaru xt6 i was given.

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and 3 4 wheelers lol

[theholycow]

Originally Posted by stonehenge

We got a 300 (2016ish) when we drove to Wyoming. That bitch was comfy. Had cooled seats! Did like.

OEM cooled seats exist for 300? BRB junkyard!

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Originally Posted by nekkidhillbilly

https://www.instagram.com/p/CNiuGbMM...6rtOsP6nkLlU0/
i got this about a year ago

"This Account is Private Already follow nekkidhillbilly? Log in to see their photos and videos."

[stonehenge]

Dont see shit

[nekkidhillbilly]

try my original link now. i used to be able to host ig images but it wont work now.


tried and tried it no longer works but still works on old pics i dont get it.

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---------- Post added at 09:24 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:23 PM ----------

fuck it imgur will work

[Dubyagee]

Big ass LeSabre.

[nekkidhillbilly]

Originally Posted by Dubyagee

Big ass LeSabre.

yeah crazy thing is thats lighter than the equinox beside it lol. has a 350 buick 4 barrel in it. just making a cruise vehicle out of it. it runs pretty fast needs very little body work the seats recovered and the brakes in the back gone through. i got it for 1800.

[theholycow]

Originally Posted by nekkidhillbilly

yeah crazy thing is thats lighter than the equinox beside it lol.

It seems that most models lost a lot of weight in the early 1970s (energy efficiency and general lack of need for so much weight), then lost shit tons more weight in the early 1980s (response to the gas crisis). A few kept losing weight into the mid-1990s. Then everything started getting much heavier in the late 1990s/early 2000s (marketing arms races for horsepower/luxury/size, and for trucks, towing capacity), a trend that I think only reversed in the last few years.

Specifically the LeSabre followed that pattern. Here's the curb weight for 1980 from my owners manual...

[nekkidhillbilly]

mines 3950. the big block cars where 4100 in 72. the 77 up b body is realistically a a body like the 73-77 cars. they use the same frame and components. different sheet metal but same underside. so they are quite a bit lighter. i get a kick of how people will look at a 60s car and say those are so heavy cause they are made of metal. then they drive a camaro weighing more than my lesabre. i had that 83 on my trailer and i could tell it was super light. i miss that car. i do like this 72 better though. i had my uncles little jeep patriot on my trailer other day and it weighed prob as much as my 72. the real weight increasing is all the over inflated useless tech they throw in them now. i had a rouge rental for a week. i had to turn half that junk off to drive it. it would throw the brakes on just random as hell not even close to a car on the interstate for that safety breaking shit. lane depart would keep me from passing a car etc... you should be a aware driver and not need this shit.

[theholycow]

Most of the extra tech doesn't really add up to a whole lot of weight. A lot of it is structural weight required to support the aforementioned arms races and also the ever-increasing crashworthiness requirements.

[nekkidhillbilly]

Originally Posted by theholycow

Most of the extra tech doesn't really add up to a whole lot of weight. A lot of it is structural weight required to support the aforementioned arms races and also the ever-increasing crashworthiness requirements.

that too but have you ever seen the weight of a modern power seat vs a 60s one. quite a bit of heavy electronics in a modern car. the auto ac for example components weight alot even though modern compressors are lighter. seems like we could make them not so heavy and just as strong. idk. i guess im just not a fan of modern cars. i prefer knobs over touch screens and bench seats over racer guy buckets.

[theholycow]

Great point about power seats. There are probably a few other heavy luxury items I'm forgetting too. At least they aren't annoying like some other power/automated luxuries...I don't mind manual or electric seats as long as they can reach the right position for me.

I gotta admit I was surprised to find out how much I like adjustable height pedals. On a long drive my ankle gets fatigued from being constantly in the same position. I adjust the height and all is well again.

A 40/20/40 split bench with fold-down armrest (which itself is hollow and contains storage space) is the perfect seat and nobody can ever change my mind. Floor/console shift levers for automatics are ridiculous; column shift is the only reasonable option. Manuals, of course, ought to sprout their shifter right out of the top of the gearbox through the floor (and to hell with the transverse mount engine concept!).

[nekkidhillbilly]

im with you on all that myself. which i dont hate a 3 on a tree manual but more gears are something modern that i am a fan of to an extent. these 10 12 speeds are over kill imo but a od 6 and even some 8 speeds is ok. the only thing adjustable pedals i like is the fact that i dont have to scoot so far back due to my legs. same for a telescoping wheel.

[nekkidhillbilly]

hey rick what kind of trans did you use to bolt up to your buick? guy wanting to build a 5 speed 350 asked me and idk nothing about sticks.

[theholycow]

has a Tremec/Borg-Warner T5. Typical T5 from junkyard not recommended for V8 with a lead foot, but fine for mostly gentle driver or lower torque engine. Can be had in strengthened "World Class" versions from stock V8 applications and easy to build up with common aftermarket race components. Bell and tail housings bolt on and are somewhat interchangeable. Some models have odd length input and/or output shafts. Some have 1" 14 spline input shaft with no matching OEM 10.3" clutch disc applications, so if 10.3" clutch is needed then things get messy (I use 10.3" flywheel and pressure plate with mismatches 7" clutch disc). Many shift lever options, two shifter mount locations. Components are widely interchangeable and cover infinite varieties of configurations. Weak versions gave it a lame reputation but in many projects it could really work great.

[nekkidhillbilly]

i found the info let him know. in other news i got a 01 ranger added to my collection for free. needs timing chain and rockers replaced. is 4x4 ext cab.