LOL pics? :bishplz: LOL text...

[theholycow]

(Park | Michigan, USA)

(I work at the front booth charging entry and parking fees to park visitors. Most of these visitors are tourists from Chicago. The entry fee is different for in-state and out-of-state license plates on the vehicles.)

Me: “Hello! Welcome to [state park]. Do you have a Michigan license plate or an out of state license plate?”

Customer: “No. No, I don’t have that.”

Me: “Are you from Michigan or out-of-state? What is the state on your license plate?”

(Suddenly, the customer screams loudly and throws his hands up in the air as if he were terrified.)

Customer: “My ID! You need to see my ID? I have ID!”

Me: “Sir, I don’t need to see your ID. I just want to know where you are from.”

Customer: “Oh.”

Me: “What state are you from?”

Customer: “Chicago. The state of Chicago.”

...I can imagine me being that particular Derper McDerpington. As I'm driving up, my fuel pump is worrying me with a weird noise, my wife is babbling about some random shit, and I'm trying to read the signs. I determine from the signs that my fee will be $7 and I expect him to eyeball my plate as I approach and ask me for $7. Then this conversation ensues:

dude in the hut says: "Hello! Welcome to [state park]. Do you have a mimibnn ice gate or an ootorf stasdfh lerhahas fait?"
(This is how I hear a lot of speech, and why I prefer email instead of phone calls.)

cao thinks: He surely saw my license plate. Must be asking if I have a frequent user season pass or something.
cao says: “No. No, I don’t have that.”

dude in the hut says: “Are you from Michigan or out-of-state? What is the state on your license plate?”

cao thinks: Why is he asking me where I'm from? OH GOD THEY THINK I'M THE GUY FROM THAT AMBER ALERT! FUCK! THEY GONNA ARREST CAO!

I'd never say "state of Chicago" though, not even if I was from Chicago.