im back bitches

[nekkidhillbilly]

yeah my thoughts

---------- Post added at 11:32 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:26 PM ----------

Originally Posted by Cez★

Wont it be the same shit shes been emailing you?

she asked if we can talk discretely (spelling). I was like go ahead no one reads my email but me.

---------- Post added at 11:36 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:32 PM ----------

its too little to late though but Ill hear her out

[stonehenge]

"go ahead no one reads my email but me"
*copy paste AOT*

[Cez★]

Post up in this clubhouse

[nekkidhillbilly]

ill let you ngas know what goes on

[theholycow]

Originally Posted by nekkidhillbilly

well I know im not going back but I want to see wtf she has to say. just for my piece of mind.

Seeing WTF she has to say won't give you peace of mind, it will only create more turmoil in you.

[nekkidhillbilly]

yeah your prob right. fuck idk what im doing.

[stonehenge]

forward it all to cao, then delete. He can save it just in case but you won't read it.

cao meanwhile will read everything and reply inappropriately to her so maybe not do that

[nekkidhillbilly]

honestly im prob hoping she will get help and shit then we can fix this. stupid of me.

[theholycow]

Originally Posted by stonehenge

cao meanwhile will read everything and reply inappropriately to her so maybe not do that

Originally Posted by nekkidhillbilly

honestly im prob hoping she will get help and shit then we can fix this. stupid of me.

[nekkidhillbilly]

I know I know. fml.

[nekkidhillbilly]

so she is now like this new guy she isn't happy apparently he lays drunk doesn't do shit for etc...now she is regretting everything. says she made the hugest mistake of her life.

[theholycow]

Bish getting what she signed up for.

[Cez★]

Yeah well, lesson learned. Dumb bitch.


"Oh nhb forget i fucked you over and lets go back to how it was before with me never having cheated on you"

-that cunt


Fuck her. She made her bed. Now lie in it whore

[nekkidhillbilly]

basically

[TATERNATER]

STOP READING HER BS. Not worth it imo.

[nekkidhillbilly]

dude I honestly miss her so much and shit its driving me crazy. im destroying this new relationship cause of it I think.

[theholycow]

Originally Posted by TATERNATER

STOP READING HER BS. Not worth it imo.

Originally Posted by nekkidhillbilly

dude I honestly miss her so much and shit its driving me crazy. im destroying this new relationship cause of it I think.

Fucking shit sucks. Don't let her fuck with your life.

You're not ready for a new relationship.

[Cez★]

Id listen to cao no matter how hard it would be too

[nekkidhillbilly]

yeah I see that but I'm in one. do I just dump her? im so fucked up. I really like her.

[nekkidhillbilly]

I also am having issues with new g/f kid. I like him he does me but he is a 15 yo with a absent father so its hell sometimes. I really don't know what im doing with that. Part of that makes me want to cut it off with her cause idk if im cut out for it.

[Cez★]

i dont think you should start trying to be his dad straight up


just aknowledge him and shit but dont go trying to raise him right now. maybe cow has something else to say

[nekkidhillbilly]

well I don't try to be but the kid already treats me like his dad so Its hard. apparently ptsd is a real thing from divorce and im suffering from it on top of a ex wife that is realizing she messed up. I have all the symptoms im finding out.

---------- Post added at 04:43 AM ---------- Previous post was at 04:24 AM ----------

I have nightmares, flashbacks, dreams, depression, grief, fear, etc......

[Cez★]

i think you need to see someone man

[TATERNATER]

Yeah and just take it slow. Sounds like u have a good one. As for the kid, best thing ive ever been told was to make sure ur there for them and set a good example. I get freaking out about a kid but u said he already likes ya, thats the hardest part (especially teens).

[theholycow]

What those guys said.

Don't let pride (or any other excuses) get in the way of seeing a professional. You are dealing with shit that can fuck you up big time, and IS fucking you up pretty badly. It's more than a layman can be expected to know how to deal with, let alone to be able to figure out AND deal with while already all fucked up. Professionals aren't magic bullets, and many of them suck (so don't be discouraged if the first one you see is worthless)...but they're more likely to have the education, resources, and emotional/logical energy to help you fix yourself. You would go to a pro for a bleeding physical injury; you're in more pain than that and can't think straight but without a pro you're trying to fix yourself by thinking (and by seeking our help, but despite my own experience and self-education, I'm no pro...though maybe in some cases my history of interacting with you can give me an advantage).

Making sure you're available and setting a good example sounds like good advice if you really want to take on the father figure role. Don't try too hard, and when you screw up, do make sure he knows that you are imperfect and can make mistakes like any human. That's basically what I'm up to with my nephew and niece, who need a decent father figure in their life. Try to remember how hard it was being a teenager, try to translate that to modern times, and try to use that to make decisions that are parental, responsible, and helpful.

If you don't want to fill that role then talk to your gf about it. She needs to know. You can tell her that you like him and don't want to hurt his feelings or pull the rug out from under him, but you're just not able to provide what he's looking for, at least at this time.

You're not even in a condition to have a gf, after all...though I totally understand not wanting to push her away since you've found her and begun to build this relationship. Just remember that as long as you're fucked up you won't be a healthy contributor to a strong relationship, and it takes a long time and lots of hard, painful work to get un-fucked-up.

How much does she know about your situation? Obviously dumping it all on her hardcore isn't necessarily a great idea, but hiding it is bad too.

How much of a partner do you think she's realistically willing to be in such sustained hard, emotional, painful work?