You are not ready. You have more processing, healing, and growing to do. You are not even stable yet; almost every day you're wildly off-kilter from the day before. You didn't cause the issues with your ex-wife or the semi-crazy chick with the crazy teenage son; those experiences wounded you, making you unfit for the one chance that you don't want to blow - but they're also going to result in growth and learning as you heal, so after that you'll be a healthier, stronger, better partner than you ever would have before (though with sensitive scars that will never completely disappear).
If this was a physical wound and you wanted to know when you could climb a ladder and caulk your chimney, it would be a lot easier for you to assess. The nature of this is that it is hard to assess even if you're in posession of all your faculties...but unfortunately, the nature of this is also that it breaks the very abilities that you would use to try to assess it.
It's kinda like asking the OBDII ECM to adjust fuel trim after contaminated fuel destroyed the O2 sensors. Not only would it need to adjust for the bad fuel, but it doesn't even have the sensor it needs to do that job. A major difference, however, is that unlike the ECM you can heal with time and effort; the ECM will need external intervention to replace the sensor and flush the bad fuel.
Just work on being happy and fulfilled while remaining ALONE. Those are important requirements before you can have a good relationship.
When you are whole, happy, fulfilled, and stable for a while, dip your toes in the dating pool; don't go looking for a wife, just try some relationships. You may find that you're ready, or you may find the wounds reopening when the relationships remind you of stuff or when the shit hits the fan in those relationships. On the other hand you may find that you ARE ready, and then you can get some constructive experience beginning a relationship at this stage of your life.
For now, keep your mind and hands busy. Advance your career. Crank out your projects. Learn shit. Spend time with friends doing shit you don't do so much when you're in relationships. Travel. Make the time pass quickly; don't sit around moping, don't pine after your ex or future wife or anyone else, don't chase wimminz, don't concentrate on relationship thoughts (you'll do plenty of thinking on that subject either way). Concentrate on enjoying life, producing, being fulfilled, growing, and being a better you; put all your effort and energy into these things.
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